So the last few days have been a rough few for me. For some reason I have felt very lonely and sad for myself. My best friend Holly had her baby. He is adorable and I am so happy for her. But then another friend had her baby.. a sis-in-law is due any day.. and another friend found out what they are having.. and it continues and continues.. I want my baby. I want to be having all the experiences of being pregnant with all my friends. I want to be finding out what Im having in the next couple weeks like i shouldve been. I want that amazing connection you and your spouse get with feeling the baby kick and going to dr appointments and all the other fun things that happen. I have been edgy and grumpy lately and I feel I have taken most of it out on my husband which is the last person who deserves it. Tommy is amazing. He is an amazing person and an even more amazing husband. He brings me home roses almost every week.. he cleans the house.. he does the laundry.. he tells me more in one day how special I am and how much he loves me then some wives hear in a week. I love him so much and can't even remember what my life was like before he was in it. And i dont want to! I feel like in some ways this couldve been a secret blessing becuase I have come to appreciate my husband much more and absolutely LOVE the time I get to spend with just him!! We have so much fun even when were just sitting at home cooking dinner together or watching a movie together or taking our dogs on a walk :) We have a beautiful house, 2 running vehicles, jobs, 2 special pups, wonderful families that are all mostly close.. I have been blessed in so many ways and .sometimes need to sit back and look at them all when im feeling sorry for myself. Thank you for everyone making our trials lately much easier.. our families are amazing

Just a quick post in case everyone hasn't heard, Tommy and I lost the baby. I went in for a d&c yesterday. Thank you everyone for your love, support, and prayers. We love and appreciate all of you.

Maui 09'

This summer we had the amazing opportunity to go to Maui! We went with our good friends (tommys cousin and wife!) Chase and Nicole. We stayed in a beautiful hotel and had so much fun!! We did lots of site seeing, ocean swimming, shopping, EATING (way more then needed!! and Snorkeling! That was by far my favorite part! (well that and bubba gumps! :) ) we went on a boat out to molokini which is a 1/2 sunken crater and they let you snorkel with the most amazing looking fish, then they feed you and take you to a place they call turtle town where we got to swim and snorkel with sea turtles!!! it was AWESOME!!! We had so much fun and I cant wait to go back. here are some random pics of the adventure! pics are in no order!

the cool aquarium
falls at the hana

my goofball tommy!

gorgeous view at a stop off on hana

on the road to hana

on the snorkeling boat

getting ready to snorkel!

our waitor and us the 2nd night i believe :)

one of the 2 nights we went there in a row! heck yeah we did!!

our homemade hot tub! :) (the one for the hotel was always packed!)

shopping at lahaina

yum!

the bedroom

living room cute little kitchen

our amazing bathroom

my cute hubby making fresh fruit smoothies!

my hearty breakfast that included mt dew (duh!) golden grahams, toast with peanut butter, banana bread, and pineapple :)

the cutest and YUMMIEST shaved ice stand we found

SEVEN....Seriously?!

So remember my last post about puppies and having a week or 2..yeah well i lied. THEY'RE HERE!!! All 7 of the little monsters! -she had 8 but one didn't make it :( - They are cute as can be! Well, kinda :) they are in the newborn rodent looking phase but are so tiny cant help but to be cute! They will be adorable in a week or 2 when their eyes are open and they grow into their heads and are more mobile :) but i promised pictures so here you are!

look at them all sleep in a row :)

tired mama and her pups!

look how small they are :) isn't he cute?!

puppies anyone?!

Thats right, things are busy here at the Merrill house! Babies, and now puppies!! Our boxers are having puppies :) My babies are having babies.. now I feel like mom! ha :) Shes huge and about to pop! Were thinking she will have them in a week or 2! So if anyone is interested (brian!)... :) Ill post pictures when the little monsters are here!

mama
mama being huge!

papa :)

Happy birthday Steph and Bri

My twin siblings Steph and Brian's birthday was on June 2nd! (they are 29!!!!) ha! although if you ask Bri he might tell you 30 cuz he can't remember with his old age! dorkus :) I love you guys and hope you had a wonderful birthday!
typical Brian face!
and typical steph face :) he he

Kamri Leigh Carroll

Yes, I am way late! who gives... :) I had the most amazing opportunity of watching this sweet little girl be born. Thanks Kim! yes, at first I was not so sure I wanted to go through this myself, adoption WAS looking like a fabulous choice...but it would just not be the same! I am so excited to have my own when the time comes. Kim did such a good job and was so strong even though her epidural had worn off. It was the most amazing thing I have ever seen. I think I will forever have a special bond with little Kamri. She is the cutest little girl! Thanks for letting me be in the room mims! Love you both!... (these pictures are out of order cuz this computer is being retarded!)

Tawni and Ballard Ballard! :)

So I never posted about one of my best friends wedding. I am the worst I know :( But my very good friends Tawni and Daniel finally tied the knot on March 14th! They are perfect for each other and I am so glad they found one another. Tawni looked absolutely beautiful! I love you guys!

MIRACLE workers...i promise!

So Tommy says I spend too much on hair products... psh! WHATEVER! a girl can NEVER have too many products.. thats like saying they have too many shoes or purses... :) Anyway, I have a few products that I LIVE by and thought I would share with YOU how my hair is always so beautiful! HA!! just kidding, really!!

UNO:

PUREOLOGY = AmA za zing!!! kinda expensive, which is why you ask the hubby for it on a little holiday/occasion :) works everytime!

DOS:

Chi silk infusion!... works great as a leave in conditioner type /a thermal protectant PLUS put a tad on after your hair is styled and it smoothes down the fly-aways!

TRES:

I love Bed Head.. not your hair when you first wake up bed head :) But the product line bed head.. my favorite of all favorites! This mousse is by far my favorite!

CUATRO:

And last but DEFINITELY not least... rockaholic DRY shampoo! I want to kiss whoever invited this genious stuff. It is my new favorite product of all time... (now thats saying a lot!) Its for the days you just dont want to wake up extra early to wash your hair (which is pretty much everyday for me!).. you spray it in, fluff and go! It refreshes in between washes and takes the grease right away! I told you... Amazing!

Good things come to those who wait.....

PICTURES! you wanted them... you got them! lots of them... so quit bugging me :) jk

living room/ great room

another angle of living room

yes my kitchen is GREEN!

my cute hair room/ salon!... yes green also :)

hallway/ guest bathroom

the exciting hallway!

master bath

our cute bedroom :)

other angle of our bedroom

There ya have it! The Merrill's crib-dizzle :)